I have re-published the facebook page for this blog and started a new twitter account called @agroecotheology. I will mainly be pushing links and posts from the blog to these places, but thought someone might want to know… Mom?
A motley crew of Wacoans has formed a group around the idea that we should be producers and not just consumers. Many of us have read Shannon Haye’s book Radical Homemakers which inspired the formation of the group and our name. At our last meeting, after getting a lesson on making kombucha, we had an interesting discussion about what it means to us to be producers and not just consumers.
As I’ve shared before, I struggle with perfectionism. This means I have a hard time not being productive. Boredom and lack of purpose drive me crazy. So, since letting go of my small business, Edible Lawns, and my dream of the perfect job in which I change the world, become famous and magically find balance and happiness, I have struggled with finding purpose and feeling productive.
This is good, because being productive and being a producer are not the same thing. I’m not sure I fully understand the difference yet. What I know for sure is that one is life-giving and one is not. My drive for perfection and to be productive usually leaves me feeling inadequate and guilty. These are not healthy motivators. Continue reading
From the tone of the last post you might surmise that not everything is working out perfectly or at least how I dream/imagine in my life. I’m not living my ideal life, or the one I have absorbed from the culture and others. I continue to work full-time in technology for a local school district which means a lot of screen time, sense of meaninglessness, boredom and a salary that qualifies my family of five for government assistance. Yet my life is also very full and filled with things I am thankful for, like my family, my community, chickens, gardens, rainwater and a job.
I recently had two interviews with a local non-profit. It was down to two candidates and I didn’t get the job, a blow to my self-esteem. I’ve also decided to quit my small business, Edible Lawns, after one last project at a local school. The stress of being successful (but not enough to quit my job) while continue to work full time for the last year and a half has taken it’s toll and proved to be too much. We’ve also been at the center of some difficult conversations in our community. All this has come together in the last week.
So, after realizing that I might not get a dream job, might not be a successful small business owner and could someday not be a part of the intentional community we’re a part of, I have sat with the thought that there is no thing on the horizon, no next thing to work on or work toward. I asked, “What if I just work at my job and go home to my family every day?” Continue reading
… I’ve been here for years.” -LL Cool J
I’m not sure what exactly i would be coming back from or what I would come back to, but I can say that I am planning on more frequent blogging in the near future. Some of the changes in my life will surely open up space for that. I’m also going to take it slow. This has become a place for more long form in depth thinking about issues than the link-y, trendy, traffic-y appetites I had when I first started blogging. That has been a more healthy and helpful pace.
To start I am going to post once a week. Here are some of the things I’m thinking of exploring:
God, The Economist by M.Douglas Meeks
This book really blew me away and I need to read through it again and process it. Very in-depth exploration of the God concepts driving our economic theory and a political theory of God. Very relevant for how to approach economic problems as Christians and incorporate our theological framework into a practical way of living life together. As always economics is just the way we decided to arrange and organize our lives together. This book unpacks that and then some.
Making Peace With the Land by Norman Wirzba and Fred Bahnson
This little book is a good introduction to thoughts on food and faith. I won’t spend a lot of time on it, but there were a couple insights worth exploring.
Eucharist and Human Liberation by Tissa Balasuriya
This is a book I found in my church’s library and have been waiting to read for a while. Tissa Balasuriya was a Catholic priest and theologian from Sri Lanka. Interested to hear what it adds to some of my previous thoughts on the eucharist (Consumerism, Industrial Food and the Eucharist, Eucharist as Eat-in, Transforming the Body and Attachment and Detachment)
We continue to learn and grow with our community, exploring what it means to live life together and try to embody a different way of being, an alternative economics and a radical faith. With all it’s ups and downs it has proven both more difficult and more fruitful than I imagined.
Even as Edible Lawns passes on to a new chapter in someone else’s hands, I am busy growing things in my yard, building coops and experimenting with various ways to live out what I believe. My wife just braided the garlic we grew and it is hanging in our kitchen as a beautiful reminder of God’s grace and provision. I want to continue to share that here and find new ways to educate, empower and encourage others to pursue sustainability.
Til next time…
Oh… hello there. Are you still paying attention, patiently waiting for more posts from me? You have the kind of perseverance and attention span that seem to be sorely lacking on the internet (and elsewhere) these days.
Well, yesterday, I broke up with Facebook for good. It was becoming an abusive relationship. (Apparently I’m not alone given the number of articles and sites on facebook addiction.) She was beginning to be controlling and manipulative about my time. It may take me some time to recover from this relationship. For example, yesterday after I got home I was in awe of my wife who had made an amazing dinner of fresh baked bread and ground nut stew for us and a friend who recently had a baby. On top of that she made pumpkin squares for dessert, granola and a fancy fruit thing for the homeschool co-op she’s a part of. I have to admit that my first thought was, “Great! Now where am I supposed to brag about how awesome my wife is, if I can’t do it on Facebook?!?” Continue reading